Santorini, Greece: A Superman Grill & The 12-Foot Drop
Welcome to CompassChaos13(CC13): A Real Travel Podcast where Compass Plans, Chaos Rules - Connections Happen Memories of Global Adventures
HEATHER (V.O.): I’m Heather, your adventure narrator and warm body for the hosts for this flying circus.
Today, we’re diving into [ TODAYS EPISODE HINT ], with [ WHO TRAVEL WITH ]!
COMPASS: It started [QUICK PLAN TEASE ].
CHAOS: Don’t forget [QUICK UNPLANNED TEASE]
HEATHER (V.O.): Before we depart on this adventure, a few safety checks. First: any brand we mention is one we actually use and trust. We get zero monetary gain for these—if that ever changes, we promise total transparency. Second: this flight is for adults only. Expect questionable language, not so subtle adult references and emotional turbulence. Finally, there are no warnings when the unexpected happens, because there are no warnings in real life… Now, let’s Meet your dueling hosts: Compass, the one who plans—and Chaos, the one who burns them. Together, they find the magic in the mess. Fair warning today Global Kin, the ladies are on a tangent for the first few minutes. I will apologize. I tried to get them to clean it up but I kept getting slapped from Compass and bite and kicked from Chaos… So your choices are going to be skip ahead or wait it out… either way Good luck and hopefully I’ll talk to you at the end.. if not .. oh well!
COMPASS (V.O.): I’m Compass. My plan is to experience the top tourist things. But, as usual, my head-space companion Chaos has other plans.
CHAOS: Hey Hey Chaos here! I am the patron saint of "we’ll figure it out,". I bring the unexpected, and the reason you want to hear travel tales.. that are actually worth listening to!
COMPASS (V.O.): Together, we bring the connection.
HEATHER (V.O.): Sit back, relax, and push that subscribe button……
CHAOS: "So, buckle up buttercups, because honestly the best stories aren't planned." Today's adventure has us back in Greece only it's 2021 and we finally escaped the United States Covid lockdown mentality. From November of 2019 to November of 2021… I went dark…. I am really dark. I didn't even know how dark and twisted my depths are. But I have a bit of a clue…
Compass: yeah those two years were interesting with you.. when you go radio silence I get worried.
Chaos: You were worried!! I had to pull back cause I saw no end and no light… Remember that dream transport had about death when we were 15… and what we saw and felt when we got pulled into the casket just before transitioning to some meadow where we saw Jeff after he died.
Compass: I do remember that very clearly yes… cause we said so this is what death must feel and look like. It was that vivid and still is thank you for the reminder.
Chaos: well forget the feeling part because this was not a peaceful feeling like the dream…. This was descending beyond the 9 levels of hell .. shit dante only made it 9 before he started ascension …
Compass: well good thing Dante didn't have you for his chaos or Inferno would have been bigger than the bible.
Chaos: still can't believe we read that crap! Higher Education may ass
Compass: ok story time.. So as Chaos started to say Greece November 2021 it's Ryan's first time out of the United States!!
Chaos: Yeap he was an over 40 virgin! And we popped his global cherry!! So satisfying… oooohhhh. So that's what the men must feel …
Compass: I don't even have words for that … it was also going to be his first time on a cruise as well ..
Chaos: Double pop!! 2 for 1 red light special kmart shoppers..
Compass: Have you been sniffing the paint thinner again?
Chaos: No it's been awhile thanks for the reminder.. you got this for now right? Good
Compass: Get back here, now is not the time for this… I can feel Heather getting impatient. She is about to yell and we haven't even started this memory yet…
Chaos: ok ok ok… we found a place that hubby was willing to try.. Greece, thanks to his younger brother who happened to marry a wonderful Greek woman and made him go … now Our hubby wanted to go… looking back now, it's a monkey see monkey do thing..
Compass: does it really matter… he was going.. really it started in 2020, that was the original date with Collette Vacations which we worked for at the time, but Covid hit the world, closed its borders and Chaos went silent… it was eerie.. 2020 was a no go… when the world opened we still were at Collette but we had found a better deal and better itinerary with ….
Chaos: da da da .. yeap you guessed it NCL… I know what you're thinking cause I would be thinking the same and trying to smell smoke or shit… there is none.. we don't book.. We use your own finances, there are no ads and if you hear ads without us telling you in the intro then you're hearing what you want to hear and that is not our problem.
Compass: what chaos is trying to say is that so far they have the best itinerary, ports of call and inclusive pricing. Pro Vet Tip: Use guide tours and cruises as what they are pre bundled tools. They have the top tourist things and the generic cultural experiences which they put out to the world… I use them as a guide, do I want to visit most of the attractions they have on the tour.. if yes great is the price comparable to others with the same attractions I want.. yes… pull up the hotels they use, check them yourself.. same with cruises. These are tools, guidelines, hotel ideas, attractions ideas and logistic ideas… use them.. no one ever said you had to book with them!
Chaos: shit for Europe we use every mainstream travel mind eye fuck broucher and put our own DIY tour together.. why because driving 6 to 8 hours with mandatory 20 min stops every 2.5 is infuriating! It's not for the bathroom, it's because EU law requires it.
Compass: correct. Soooo NCL 7 day Greek islands cruise round-trip out of Athens… having never been to Greece, it being a High Life Adventure Goal just under Egypt and Scotland.. we were so in.. we were just happy someone else was able to get him excited about a place other than America! This cruise did Crete, Rhodes, Mykonos,Olympia, Corfu which changed to Patmos within 30 days of departure and Santorini before disembarking back in Athens.. This was an amazing itinerary for an unbelievable price and only 60 percent capacity… So what about the mask… it was only on the ship by the time we landed in Greece, they had lifted the mandatory masks. This was the last full day and night on the NCL Jade.
Chaos: FREEeedddooommmm… on so many levels .. I felt like a speed ball coked up chipmunk… finally I could LIVE! Oh and did we!
Compass: You can't be serious calling what we did in Santorini LIVING!! This whole damn day was nothing but a disaster!
Chaos: You're definitely NOT telling this memory then. So sit there, shut up and watch a pro turn nothing into something! It started early at 6am with no time to waste. This was a tender port and our options were to get to the top of the island where Thera and Oiu still stand… vertical cable car or stairs which come with or without donkey and their presents… hubby and transport conversed over breakfast.. cable car or stairs.. transport and I wanted the donkey compass voted only on the way back because she didn't want to smell like one all day… even though she acted like one all day!
Compass: I did no such thing!
Chaos: Please you were a pissy little bitch all day .. just wait I'll show you why.. so cable car on the way up.. after breakfast we headed back to the room with some coffee, made sure we had what we needed and hung out on the balcony waiting for the call to tender. The cruise shore excursions were all in their waiting places since their tenders were going to the newer port… ours was to the old port with the cable car into the old town. Hearing the call for tender we made our way down with the rest of the cattle to slaughter only to turn into sardines, but thanks to Covid people were still keeping their distance and the tenders were only ¾ capacity with masks required…
Compass: There was a plan … ATV rental on our own; Compass had done the research and pre-booked, but only rented a double seater and hubby drove. Hindsight, next time we do Santorini I'm driving my own ATV or Heather is anyway! We were to head Oui first to walk around, take in some views and have lunch… then head to the other end of the island to see Akrotiri and the red beach.. then make our way back to the rental where we can drop off and still have time to walk around…
Chaos: She did put a lot of time into studying the map and making sure she had directions printed out… buuuuttt… see I didn't pack them and Compass didn't download them to the Transport phone …. We haven't come to that yet…
Compass: Now the truth comes out.. I knew you hid them on purpose!
Chaos: (giggle) Actually you had Transport pack and un pack so many times that we collectively left them on the table in the middle of the pile of clothes that we were not taking, in the final go through the night before. And we were taking a fucking checked bag!! Compass was trying for everything even the showerhead!! Transport had to step in… now that was a show worthy of raisenetts.
Compass: The line moves along nicely since we were the only ship in the protected waters in Nov. It took about 10 minutes before we landed at the small port area at the very bottom of the cliff. No one allowed me time to stop to stare and take this all in. I was rushed to the cable car to purchase one way tickets…
Chaos: Wana Wana Wana that's all you did all day… how Transport managed to keep you under control was epic. Standing in line for the cable we are looking up watching now… I feel Transport's stomach start rolling, I feel her heart start to get faster and faster the higher the car climbs and finally the dizziness… oh No Bitch!!!
Compass: it wasn't me I keep telling you… I wasn't looking. I had my figurative eyes closed and didn't open until we were at the top out of the cable car. That was all Heather.
Chaos: no it wasn't… that was you because you did the research you should get the Google pictures of the cable cars from every angle… you knew what was coming she knew what was coming… She just didn't expect it to be a vertical fucking climb the last 30 feet so even if you figurative eyes were closed… you tell me if transport saw it you saw it… so it was you cause I know sure to shit it wasn't me…
Compass: no you were thinking what if this cable breaks would we swing like Tarzan first then hit and roll or would we just plummet down till we hit that small ledge and land somewhere about..
Chaos: (giggle) it kept you occupied since you were trying to figure out ways we could possibly survive without an act from the Goddess’.. which no one would, FYI. Just like when we go over our RI State bridges everyday you make transport drive with the windows down no matter what weather in case the bridge collapsed
Compass: that's seconds for survival and not having the electric short when water hits it cause you can't open yours doors with all that pressure pushing against it. Our parents taught us that one and a few more.. I paid attention
Chaos: (questioningly) then glad we have you aboard!?
So at the top heart rate was steadying, dizziness almost gone and solid ground beneath our feet all was right for 5 minutes… Compass frantic again to get the phone to pull up the atv place, Moto Manos Fira renal Car ATV Buggy Scooter, and get directions while hubby asked ok so which way now I don't just want to stand here .. and she is yelling Stand there and look like a pretty, baby that is all you need to do… Transport is just smiling looking at her phone.
Compass: yeah somehow on this day you were the voice of reason and restraint…
Chaos: don't ever do that to me again it was unnatural and dirty… I scrubbed myself with yellow thistle for a week straight when we came home.. I still have nightmares about being an adult and keeping YOU of all people from hurting people!
Compass: sometimes chaos you have to step up… thank you for doing so.
Chaos: please don't thank me, that makes it worse… I like what we have, don't ruin it!
Compass: you never did take compliments well… always a secret.
Chaos: No secret I do what I want depending on what is needed, that is it. I don't need anyone's approval, appreciation or applause. You like it great if not too late.. Now with all four of us looking for this Atv in Fira.. I had whipped out the good ole blue dot!! Only this time I was in charge and I looked at the arrow and walked.. though we did have to slow down a bit to let it catch up a few times .. it really wasn't that hard once we got through the little maze of streets..
Compass: from what I did see it was very lovely, the white washed walls, the bells in the archway over the stairs… bougainvillea flowing down the walls from the tended hidden gardens.
Chaos: yeah yeah yeah.. pretty flowers … white walls… blue ocean… blah blah… it was the ATV I wanted, transport wanted and hubby wanted… you were the only one trying to smell flowers when everyone else was smelling gas!! We found it!! Hubby signs since he is the driver we get fitted for helmets and handed the keys… off we go!
Compass: hubby asks where to first Oui, take a left and just go…
Chaos: ( giggles) oh he did alright… with a few revs and a pop… like a demon released from hell off we went trying to stay on the back… navigating was not even a thought at this point. This was Compass first crack of the day… she wasn't able to use the phone to give directions, there was no GPS on an ATV and papers well if we had them would have been useless.. since well it was all open duh!! Once we got outside the city the way we took was by instinct.. coming up into Oia along high cliffs with guardrails locals driving right up on us and passing with hubby trying to give as much room as possible…. All while looking down at imminent burn and death… not again so tired of being burned .. though still better than drowning!
Compass: We found what may or may not have been a parking spot… since this was only our 3nd time driving in Greece and first in Santorini we weren't that familiar with the unwritten local parking rules. Not going to lie since I wasn't sure about the parking space we were using, I didn't want Heather to wander far just in case.. I had tight reins on everyone.. Even Ryan didn't want to wander that far.
Chaos: you and hubby had transport so worked up she couldn't even see the adventure, the story or the possible connections that could be gained from coming back and not having the ATV!
Compass: Sure… Ryan's first international trip and you want to devastate him..
Chaos: Actually he wasn't hubby at this point . He was still boyo! So yes devastation to check his survival instincts, self reliance and unexpected chaos levels … very necessary when you're coming into 8 years of a relationship and have not traveled internationally together and one being a newbie! It brings a different type of necessary relationship testing. Makes life moments easier, cause now you have.. well still not as bad as the time….
Compass: Can't believe he wanted and still is married to us.. well you really.
Chaos: He can't kill me without hurting Transport… and I don't mean that physically…
Compass: If I can find a way Chaos.. I'm the one you should worry about.
Chaos: Like I always say.. Good Luck!
Compass: Thank you. Back to the story… so not wandering far from the make shift parking spot we walked down a bit and took a seat at a tourist restaurant. We ordered a gyro and a soda with an espresso and latte at the end of the meal and got back on the ATV to head to see Black sands beach.. We drove to the other side of the island passing the airport on our way to Kamari Beach.
Chaos: in the office season!! I mean come on.. did we really need to see a black sand beach? Well we did and it was crap. I'm sure it looks nice and inviting in the summer with the chairs and umbrellas and restaurants open when you're hip to hip with everyone… (giggles)
Compass: That is the reason we went during off season.. so we could see it for what it is. And it was our first time seeing a black sand beach. It was just a black sand beach.
Chaos: like I said, it was not pretty in the off season… looked run down. So that was a waste of a detour to Ancient Thera and Akrotiri. Ryan voices his disappointment as he should have… he turned, looked at Transport and said where to next? Ancient Thera… or so was the plan. (Giggles)...
Compass: Trying to navigate while one the back of an ATV, not a smart move… I tried as best I could to navigate from memory and read the signs… from what I remembered it was the main road and follow the signs .. I mean it's a top tourist attraction for Goddess sake.
Chaos: yeah… but in the center of town we saw a sign for Akrotiri.. and completely forgetting about Ancient Thera, it was a right to Akrotiri… should have taken the left…. Always take the left. Have you not learned this Compass yet? 98% of the time it's the left…
Compass: Yes well again.. hard to navigate, read signs, pull from collective memory and hold on to darling. I mean honestly how did you manage to take pictures at the same time? You know I could have used the extra focus and brain power so to speak
Chaos: it's just like riding a horse… use the thighs.. which is what I had Transport do… we survived..
Compass: BEARLY!! This whole Santorini day was an absolute nightmare! .. As we took the right now trying to find Akrotiri heading towards the town of Pyrgos back to the west side of the island to head south.
Chaos: See all we had to do was head west till we couldn't then south till we couldn't .. I mean we are on an island we can only go so far. As we were coming into either Prygos or Megalochri we came to a very interesting intersection with no lights, no signs.. no real visual of who had the right of way… it was fantastic!
Compass: since it was only our third time driving in Europe and second time in Greece… besides we weren't driving darling, now our hubby was . And it was his second time driving in Europe and all his few hours experience was Greece mainland, same with us. This Greece island driving is a bit different! So Ryan comes to the intersection where there is one car rolling into the intersection.. other cars are starting to approach.. the car in front hits the gas off they go…
Chaos: Da Da Da here safety comes to wreck your day!! Now hubby, but then he was boyo (boyfriend for those that don't know, he wanted transport to make sure it was clear for the record) … there hope everyone’s happy. Can I now get back to the good part.. So boyo takes the safe route and starts stopping, Compass is looking around to try to figure out the legal local driving etiquette along with boyo when I decide to swivel transports head around only to come face to face with the red balls of Superman!!
Compass: That was a bit much to register… how is Superman doll right in our face… moving Heather's eyes up we see a tie just above the belt …. Tunnel vision was beginning to subside…
Chaos: Shiny silver metal was now coming into view….. It grew bigger and bigger… HOLY FUCK!!! It’s the Fucking grill of a garbage truck with Superman strapped to it…. And transport’s mouth is right at
Compass: CHAOS!! I quickly take control of Heather and have her slap Ryan on the arm screaming go … go…. Unsure if he heard through the helmets
Chaos: I don’t know if he heard but he turned his head to look back and got the same view we did only 20 seconds ago, just now closer and the truck began honking…. [giggles].... Boyo hits the throttle with Oh Shit…..
Compass: We made it through this unscathed, but the day and the near death experiences weren’t done…. We somehow made it down to the red beach. Remembering that this would have been a stop after visiting Aroktiri, I had Ryan stop the ATV for a quick break and some photos of the red rocks against a white church with a blue doom..
Chaos: After about 10 minutes boyo and I were getting bored. Him and I were both voicing our disappointment of yet another planned stop…. Compass has not won any points on this day at all… Before jumping back on the ATV boyo looks at the time, its 330… all board time is 6pm….
Compass: Having done the research I knew full well that we missed the time to visit Akroktiri since it was off season and it closed at 3pm…. So the only place to go was back to Fira so we could turn in the ATV and possibly get to see something other than farmland, black & red sand beaches, several close calls on turns and with a garbage truck I was ready to throw in the towel….. And Ryan agreed. Back on the ATV but not before we took a look at google maps. Now knowing we wanted the old port not the new port we put it in to see how long it would take… it was about 30 minutes so reality was an hour for the human factor…. Ok so it could still be savlagable….
Chaos: And off we go….. Now, boyo wasn’t dicking around about safety…. 5 minutes of zipping back towards the port all the sudden boyo slows the ATV down, pulls over a bit and swirls his head and throws the helmet yells….. Akrotoiri and points to the sign… are we going….. I thought Compass was going to slap the stupid out of him…. She is screaming are fucking serious we just said back to the port so we could get some local food and drink before catching the one of the last tenders back to the ship…
Compass: Yes, Heather had it come out much better, it was more of no it’s closed now… back to the port… So back on the throttle goes Ryan…. We go for about 10 minutes and he sees a sign port with a ship….
Chaos: [laughing] no one even blinked when he followed it down along some really narrow cliffs with empty buses now coming up as we were going down. We are about half way down and boyo is taking the hairpin corners a bit slower now seeing the lack of guard rails, the buses and the wire supporting the cliff face along the side of the road…. Guess what comes swinging around a hairpin corner on our ass….. Yeap a cruise tourist bus…. This is NOT the port we want….. Our port has NO TOURIST BUSES or cargo ships…. I am laughing to hard to have transport advice boyo this is not the way and down to the bottom we went…. We get to the bottom….. He looks out and points to the ship anchored way off shore…. I am dying, Compass is flipping out and Transport, is just like… yeap, I wondered if this was going to happen. We read about this…..Then Boyo banged a uie… and back up we went..
Compass: going back up was not as bad as coming down… but it was still
Chaos: Awesome!! Just one wrong move and ride or die would have been before we were even in the will….. I mean our mom raised us better than that!
Compass: Sure, now you want to take mom’s advice….. We were finally back on top of the cliffs heading back to Fira. Truth be told, by this time I was not happy. We had missed every damn thing, but some crappy beaches, and we are not beach people….
So we spent the day driving around an Ancient island that is buried in history and we saw NOTHING of it!!!
Chaos: Wow, that was almost verbatim just less colorful… but the story isn’t over yet. Now you would think that it would take that long to go to the bottom then come back up….[laughs]..... It took 30 minutes to get from Red Beach to the Ferry Terminal which is called the New Port…. And signs just say PORT… [laughing].... Then it took about 15 minutes to get back up to the top. Transport decides now is a good time to take out her phone for the time… pushing 4:15pm, I didn’t think that was too bad at all; we had about an hour and 30 minutes before the last tender left…. Besides we had our passports on us, credit cards and our mini-computers (phones)..... We wouldn’t be stranded if we missed the ship! I mean honestly we would have beat the ship if we flew from Santorini to Athens, direct flight last one out or first one in the am one way for probably about 75 euro in 2021…. I was seriously not worried about it… PRO VET TIP: Always have your passport in a secured place on your being and I don’t mean a pocket or fanny pack. You get held up at gun or knife point or by a group they will have you empty pockets and show your fanny pack .. if they are smart thieves. Thinking about places you can have it directly touching your skin. Why? Because they have to get real close to 1. Notice any disturbance through the clothing over the bags, pockets and fanny packs… 2. If they do notice after the emptying of the initial normal things, which is takes too much time so not likely but just in case; they will come closer for a deeper inspection to see what else is hiding and now the element of surprise is yours because they are studying your body for more to take, not worried if you will fight back since you have already proven you will give whatever under threat…. Then you have a choice, fight or give….
Compass: Only the person in this circumstance can make the best decision for them.. I know what Chaos and Heather would do…. Everyone needs to make their own decisions.
Chaos: [annoyed] Excuse me I was not done… I have one last point to make why you should keep your passport attached to your skin…. So Rude! 3. When then put their hands on you to take it anything it becomes self defense…. Have at it…
Compass: Actually, anytime our life is in immediate life threatening circumstances due to another's actions is self defense, as long as the defense is not excessive force.
Chaos: Ah, 135 lb woman ….. We are always being intimidated or threatened by someone…. Or at least they try…. Why do you keep telling me that it’s not self defense when I want to slap them upside the head? People try to intimate us to justify their stupidity but I can’t slap them in self defense… How does that work?
Compass: Our life is not under duress in that type of intimidation… That is different… That is not self defense …. That would be battery on our part.
Heather: Hello Kin, Heather cutting in…. Ladies, we are almost done… Chaos, you have been that person and I know for a fact there are several people that want to slap you for many reasons including trying to get others to justify your own stupidity sometimes. So stop being a hypocrite….
Chaos: Oh you’ll pay for that…… First, my stupid shit is usually childish and will only physically hurt us for the most part… there may be collateral damage but most of the time that is not intentional. Second, the stupid shit I say is just that STUPID BUT it’s always to make a point ….. People want to make stupid comments or questions. I won't stop them….. But don’t get pissy at me after Compass tries to reason with them.. I throw some crazy fucked up shit out there to just stop it all.
Compass: Can we please finish this memory up please…. This is by far my worst travel experience and that includes the unexpected engagement cruise. It took us about 30 minutes to make it back to Fira because we were actually slowing down to read signs…
Chaos: [giggles] we came into Fira and almost went back out of Fira…. We had stopped just as we got to the outskirts of the town to pull up directions to the ATV place…. Compass, Heather and Hubby thought they had it…….Me….. I had no idea and was just gonna sit back and see what happens, it could be fine. According to google it was just up the road about 5 mins and just down the left off a side road. Thinking we should see other ATV’s we should be fine… Oh and we forgot to mention that the ATV shop closes at 5pm. It was 15 minutes till….
Compass: Now I felt pressure…. 15 minutes to ATV closing.. 1st we have to find the place, then drop it off, followed by finding the way back to the area we need to get to the port below for the tender. The stairs, either by way of a donkey or walking, stairs were not an option. Which only means one thing…. The cable car..
Chaos: Before we get there we are missing a great connection… As we zoomed by the left because it was tucked away and when you're coming up on it unless you know it is there…. Bye bye left at Albuquerque once again…… I feel like Bugs Bunny
Compass: Don’t do it! I don’t know who owns those rights but I don’t want to find out by copyright infringment…..
Chaos: {like Bugs} EHHH Was COMPASS?! Nah…. not the same ring…. So zooming passed the left, either boyo or transport recognized something that made him pull over and pull out the phone…. “WHAT THE FUCK”.... This was not us, this was boyo…
Compass: remember was his first international vacation and only second time driving in Greece and he knew 6pm was all aboard which meant that 5:30 was the last tender. He was anxious…
Chaos: He was pissed and paniced….. He tells transport “I don’t fucking know”... somehow transport didn’t laugh or really react in any way.. It was just ok, let's see…. And Da DA DA…. Here the locals come to save the day!! She sees three local men sitting outside sipping coffee… she tells boyo she will be right back, walks over to the three men and asks “English”... to which each shakes their heads… YEAH!! MY TURN!!! So I started playing charades…. I have transport squat like she is on a horse but her hands are out like she is gripping a bike… and she is saying A..T…V…. and making her hands throttle…. Then says lost and shrugs her shoulders and looks around…. I really wish there was a mirror. The reflection in the window just wasn’t doing it justice [giggles]... Then one of the men leans back in his chair and yells something in Greek…
Compass: Save guess here that it was a name we never hear because out comes an older wise woman with a broom….
Chaos: My kind of woman…. She glared at the men like this better be good you fucking jackass’s you disturbed my cleaning…. Then looked at me and her face softened a bit… her eyes much more…. Then I had the bright idea to make transport point to the sticker on the back of the helmet…. So transport again does our charades and then turns and points to the back of her helmet… then turns back to the woman… She looked a bit confused …
Compass: So CHAOS this time has Heather put up her finger… she takes off her helmet and flips it around…. Points to the sticker and says “Where” and throws up her hands point in both directions…. It was embarrassing..
Chaos: Stop…. She got a kick out of it because she smiled, look closer at the helmet and then gave us directions really fast…… and used her own charades at the same time…. Only she didn’t know we are good with left and right……
Compass: Oh she got the confused look on Heather’s face because she slowed down the directions and the charades again ….. Heather tried to repeat but somehow she got it messed up..
Chaos: That was great… The woman took transport’s left arm and swung her around so the woman was now behind us…. She then used transport like a puppet master [laughing].... I was so impressed…. It was so fast no one had time to react…. She now took transport’s right arm, swings it up to middle level and says straight or what I registered as straight…. Then she swings the right arm to the right…. And says right or what I again registered as a direction….
Compass: Chaos is losing it laughing so hard….. I am mortified that we are being handled by a wise woman ….. And Heather, well now she is making sure she understands… and puts her arm down by her side, the wise woman steps off to the right…. They look at each other…. Heather says straight and puts her arm up to her middle…. Then swings her arm quickly to the right and says right….. And smiles.. The wise woman gives us a nod and smiles at us… Heather puts her hands together and gives her a slight head bow and says Thank you in English, not being able to remember the Greek translation…
Chaos: Transport walks back to boyo laughing hysterically with my help…. She was barely able to get the directions out….
Compass: Ryan was calmer at this point and found the humor in the tale of the local connection… Around we turned and about 3 minutes on the right there was a fork… Ryan slows down and asks this … I said this is the only quick right and it looks familiar.. As he takes it, we then see the ATVs being hauled into the garage for the end of the day.. We jumped off the ATV looking at our phone… 5:10… oops…. Ryan talked to the owners and they were just finishing up so it was not a problem they had not left yet…. Perfect. Now on find and buy the cable car ticket down….
Chaos: This actually wasn’t that bad… It really didn’t take long. We remembered the way and made it to the cable car ticket booth.. No line for tickets, no wait for the car of death..
Compass: You’re not kidding….. I thought going up was bad.. Coming down was …. I don’t have the words……
Chaos: I do…. That first drop… It's doozy! Holy Fuck.. it’s like they send you out a foot and drop you 12 feet straight down before leveling out for a smoother ride!! I hate to see it on a windy day….. Oh baby!!
Compass: Nope I am good… When we go back and we will…. Stairs in both directions, making that executive decision now…
Chaos: Blah. Blah. Blah…. We lived through the drop and the ride down to the port for the cruise passengers not on tours through the cruise ship… There was a tender boarding when we got to the bottom…. Transport asked if it was the last one, the steward said no there was one more in 15 minutes… Perfect time for a beer and boyo thought so too.
Compass: After Chaos and Ryan had their beer I was able to walk the short pier and snap a few sunset pictures.. We boarded the last tender and we were back on the ship by time required. Now it was time for the usual last night ritual…. Pack, dinner, tip and drink….. Tomorrow comes 2 full days in Athens again!
Heather: Hi again Kin…. I’m going to stop the ladies here and move into what is my favorite time reflection. This is the time where I advise what I have learned about this memory and what I hope you take away, on top of what you yourself got out this…
Always add an hour for the "Human Factor"—because between missed turns and garbage truck standoffs, the clock is your biggest enemy
Sometimes you have to let a wise local woman with a broom physically manifest the way for you. Humility is the best GPS.. Never be embarrassed for finding a way…. No one ever said it had to be graceful.
"Port" is a vague suggestion, not a specific destination. If you see massive tourist buses and cargo ships but no cable car, you’re at the wrong drop-off. Research the name of your pier, or prepare for a "ride or die" U-turn back up the mountain
Taking a newbie on their first international trip is the ultimate stress test. You don’t truly know your partner until you’ve faced the "red balls of Superman" on a garbage truck grill together. Travel isn't just about the views; it’s about checking survival instincts before the "I dos.
The ride up is a vertical climb; the ride down is a 12-foot drop into the abyss. Only you can decide if the "cable car of death" is worth the five minutes of saved time, or are the donkey-poop stairs a safer bet for your sanity? Sometimes the "easy" route is the one that actually triggers the most trauma.
Keeping your passport "attached to your skin" isn't just about theft; it’s about the peace of mind to have a beer while waiting for the last tender. If everything goes sideways—you miss the ship, you lose the ATV, or you get held up—do you have the "element of surprise" and the documents to fly to the next port, or are you stranded in the dirt?
Compass: So what I am hearing is….. Go embarrass yourself, be open, have fun, laugh and live like tomorrow is not guaranteed because it is not…..oh and always be prepared to fly the coop… does that sound about right….
Heather: in a very general sense… [English Accent} By Chaos I think she’s got it!! Let’s bring the voices back so they can say their so long’s and go silent for a while writing out more memories…..
COMPASS (calm, professional tone) On that note… we hope you enjoyed this episode of CompassChaos13. Join us every Sunday at 1 p.m. Eastern, or 1300 hours for our fellow travelers in time zones unknown. Next stop: [COUNTRY] — this time, we will be adventuring with Boyo but SOLO, and you can bet we’ll be forging even more unforgettable connections.
CHAOS (excited, playful): Oh, it’s another great one! I’ll be the one causing total mayhem after a mistaken identity goes expansively wrong— and somehow, we still make it out alive. But hey, the chaos? Always memorable.
COMPASS (mock patience): Listeners, help me out here — please engage with us.
CHAOS (interrupting, smirking): Compass please just stop!! That pleading really hasn’t been working so let’s try something else… Keep your shit to yourself. We will go on talking about us because we have plenty of stories going back to 1995 and we have plans on the books for the next two years to make more!! So keep silent, we only need your ears and a finger. Sure you can use the middle one if you want to, go ahead. Then you can take that finger…
COMPASS: CHAOS!!
CHAOS: and put it right on the share as you post this and the finger to social media using the tag @compasschaos13 … Why cause you know you want to talk ABOUT us not to us…. You love us or hate us, either way your talking baby.. Mauh!
COMPASS (cutting in, mock sigh): Please Stop. The show’s over. Just get out!(sound tired) I’m Compass — bringing the planned direction.
CHAOS (proudly): And I’m Chaos — bringing the unexpected!
Compass: Together, we make global connections.
HEATHER (narrator / flight attendant tone) Welcome back to the present. On behalf of your dueling hosts, Compass and Chaos, thank you for adventuring with CompassChaos13.
Before you stand, please make sure your pants are dry, your eyes are clear, and your snots are wiped — we don’t do refunds for emotional turbulence.
Some of what you heard today may sound unbelievable, but rest assured — it’s all true, and no one on this adventure is innocent.
For photos, travel tips and to read our blogs wander over towww.CompassChaos13.com.
Thank you for connecting with us today. We hope YOUR layover in OUR world brought a little curiosity, a bit of laughter, and a lot of connection.
This is CompassChaos13 — signing off.