St. Thomas: Shiny Assets, Shady Illness, and A/B Combo Driving
Welcome to CompassChaos13(CC13): A Real Travel Podcast where Compass Plans, Chaos Rules - Connections Happen Memories of Global Adventures
HEATHER (V.O.): I’m Heather, your adventure narrator and warm body for the hosts for this flying circus.
Today, we’re cruising into the US Virgin Islands, St. Thomas to be exact, with hubby!
COMPASS: It started the night before, the first night on the ship. .
CHAOS: and it ended with Transport wearing her bank account on fingers, neck, ears and wrist! I love rage shopping. I always get something shiny and rare.
HEATHER (V.O.): Before we depart on this adventure, a few safety checks. First: any brand we mention is one we actually use and trust. We get zero monetary gain for these—if that ever changes, we promise total transparency. Second: this flight is for adults only. Expect questionable language and emotional turbulence. Finally, there are no warnings when the unexpected happens, because there are no warnings in real life…
HEATHER (V.O.): Now, let’s Meet your dueling hosts: Compass, the one who plans—and Chaos, the one who burns them. Together, they find the magic in the mess.
COMPASS (V.O.): I’m Compass. My plan is to experience the top tourist things. But, as usual, my head-space companion Chaos has other plans.
CHAOS: Hey Hey Chaos here! I am the patron saint of "we’ll figure it out,". I bring the unexpected, and the reason you want to hear travel tales.. that are actually worth listening to!
COMPASS (V.O.): Together, we bring the connection.
HEATHER (V.O.): Sit back, relax, and push that subscribe button……
CHAOS: "So, buckle up buttercups, for this recent tale of a misdiagnosis leading to some serious revenge shopping…, because honestly the best stories aren't planned."
COMPASS: Here is where I would usually advise that I planned this cruise.
CHAOS: but she can't.. she had almost nothing to do with the booking. The only thing she had to do was choose the next Caribbean Cruise itinerary .See what happened was, on our April 2022 surprise to both boyo and Transport engagement cruise, they bought the future cruise next credits on the ship, again. If you can't tell, we gave boyo the cruise travel bug. So we had several pre-depoisted cruises we haven't picked yet. Boyo was itching for his 3rd cruise.
Compass: Yes he was… I honestly can't remember why I allowed the Caribbean. I know I wanted to do Asia for the price it was so worth it… but we couldn't convince darling that he wanted to go.
CHAOS: So Caribbean again in the same year…. We, did the Caribbean in our very late teens into our early twenties. That was twenty years ago, let's see what's changed! So Compass agreed to this 7 day Eastern Caribbean Cruise. Oh wasn't it double up or triple up for the credits and double latitudes points… I think that is why… but I could be wrong
I haven't been allowed any plastic since this day… even though it can be considered an investment of easy liquidation if necessary…
Compass: OH BOY! Still trying to justify this day… almost four years later… feel guilty do we?
Chaos: not even close… I hold firm with the solid investment.
Compass: We will see… so this particular story, like most of ours on a cruise, starts the night before… This is not our first night on the ship now our 2nd night on the ship… which was a sea day so…
Chaos: Drinking our worth of the drink package was necessary… PRO VET TIP: the adult alcohol drink package also includes your soda as well… I always factor that in because 15 drinks a day to break even but not in alcohol… we will usually have about 8-10 sodas a day, then start drinking after our port is over or afternoon if it's a sea day… Makes it worth it for us.
Compass: Well sea days are a bit heavier on the alcohol and a bit lighter on the soda. Those days are usually spent out of boredom… Bingo, Deal or No Deal .. Effy!!!
Chaos: Shiney!!! Effy is all me baby.. well and transport… so this night was somewhat early
Compass: passed midnight is not early when you are getting up at 6am…
Chaos: waa..waaa..waaa… dear Goddess please remind Compass that we are only in our 40s and not dead or cripple yet… so transport and boyo pretty shitted… though not shitted enough to fuck with peoples cabin door pineapples… Pro Vet Tip: know the meaning behind the fruit (pineapple doesn't always mean welcome, like garden nomes or pink flamingos in Florida aren't always just pretty yard decorations; some have a double meaning).. if you hang things on your cabin door you will get some interesting things .. pineapples may end upside down… odd messages appear on white boards… you are on a ship with a bunch of strangers and the closest thing you have to police is ship security which is paid for by the ship… Don't be stupid!! Hang your shit inside and communicate via messenger on the cruise app… I really can't believe we have to tell people some of these things!!
Compass: Not everyone is like you Chaos and thinks everyone is bad.
Chaos: i.dont think everyone is bad… I believe in the native American oral tale of everyone having two wolves inside fighting for dominance (giggles), the one you feed is the one that dominates… Moral, don't feed both sides or the sides themselves will then evolve into voices that are both good and bad.. (laughing hysterically)...
Compass: what is so funny with the exception of the last part that was ad.lipped .. the tale was direct and spot on.. I'm actually proud of you. So what's so funny
Chaos: (still laughing) .. I pictured us… how we have always fought for dominance over transport… thing was that neither of us are evil.. okay I can be evil but so can you Compass… that is what I mean.. cross either one of us on something we feel strongly about, people will see evil .. thus transport feed both of us because she always required both of us… now well, she’s fucked… cause we are no longer trying to dominate her and she is no longer trying to hide us… we are now in fact working as a wonderfully unique socially disfunctional human. I love it
Compass: I … I… can't argue with that, but we are normal.. I still believe that. Heather is just not hiding or shrinking any more.. Let's get back to the story. We haven't even been to bed yet…
Chaos: That's what he said!!
Compass: What?! ..NO!… Half in the bag Heather and Ryan pour themselves into bed and pass out… somehow Heather gets up all bright eyes and bushy tailed ready to conquer St. Thomas.
CHAO: She was the only one… boyo on the other was still passed out.. even with me opening and banging drawers.. intentionally trying to wake him up. After several bangs of the closet and drawers he woke….
Compass: He woke alright…. To a nasty hangover and a very queasy stomach….
Chaos: Thinking he drank himself into this…. I'm not dealing with it, transport is sporting a hangover and if truth be told so am I… so there is no sympathy or empathy here at all… get the fuck up you little princess, find your big boy underoos and man up!! We are fucking in St. Thomas!!! Now granted it's our (mine, Compass and Transports) second time here… last time we were here it was back in the late 90 early 2000 and all we did was drink and go to the beach… Hey don't judge, we were in our very early 20’s… 21 to be exact cause we booked our own cabin and you need to be 21 to book and stay in a cabin by yourself or with someone that is under 21.
Compass: Which meant that I was in charge of sights for this port and I did my research!
Chaos: that you did… we had a packed day ahead of us.. freedom time was 12pm to 7pm… no tender for this port so as long as we were on the gangplank by 630… we were good. So with that as boyo purged any remaining alcohol in his system… a very irate Transport went storming off to breakfast alone. With Compass’ and me feeding the internal rage…
Compass: Some more than others… Everyone on the ship seemed to be taking their time with breakfast. We didn't even get up there till about 10..
Chaos: you know what I always found funny, when the ship pulls into port or begins to drop anchor everyone thinks that means that we will be getting off the ship soon… people it is about an hour after they tie down or drop anchor that they then will allow passengers off for the day… seeing people shovel food into their mouths and then go running to their cabin or to the stairs to wait for an hour is beyond my comprehension. This port we still had about two hours before we were due to dock so no one was rushing.
Compass: They are just excited.. remember we have done that a few times…
Chaos: yeah but most of the time that is because we booked an independent tour for the disembark time and to be there before they arrive. That usually happens with mom because she is high anxiety.
Compass: True, but we never missed a tour because of us. So as passengers began finishing up their breakfast and making their way to the cabins waiting for the call, we just sat enjoying the view. Chaos and I kept Heather's anger turned on full volume. Ryan was not getting off easy because he drank too much and didn't feel like going exploring.
Chaos: When we got back to the room they had already started the announcements for the shore excursions … one last attempt to get boyo to join…
Compass: in vain… he was not having any part. All he wanted was sleep. FINE, sleep for you it is…
Chaos: Off Transport goes all by herself… not going to lie, starting to miss these alone vacation days… think it's time for solo headspace vacation… I don't know about you Compass but I'm about ready to put some people in special shoes and toss them.
Compass: I know you are, I can feel it. I'm working on the mental headspace vacation. Let's get through the family one we are on now at Universal Epic Park before we jump into another.
Chaos: Nope.. not unless you want to take the chance that our freedom will be taken by a jury of our peers within the next few months.
Compass: let's focus on this story then we can discuss our headspace adventure.. Now belly's full, Ryan down and out for this port, Heather bounded down to the gangplank and off we went…. Right into Charlotte Amelia St. Thomas stepping foot on solid land at about 12:45pm..
Chaos: Fyi… the port from the town is about a good mile and a half walking… be prepared if you want to walk to the historical area which is where the jewelry shops and such are… Amazing prices for Jewelry on this island. But we are not there yet… soon (giggles)
Compass: Now off the ship the first place on our adventure was the Paradise point cable car since it was a 5 minute walk and right across the road… once you left the port area.
Chaos: That was fun! Once out on the main road BE CAREFUL … in The U.S. Virgin Islands they drive on the opposite side of us in the states.. think Brits!
Compass: that is because those islands used to be under British control so they follow British driving rules…
Chaos: Bet they wish they were still part of England instead of Americans… they would have government mandated holiday time.. not just a few days but weeks …
Compass: 5 weeks roughly to be exact.. so that is just under 3 days per month at a 40 hour work week that is being accrued.
Chaos: Yeah we Americans fucked that up during the industrial revolution… instead of going after the government we unionized!!!
Compass: You're not looking at history through the correct lens.. you're looking at it through hindsight lens… not going to help.
Chaos: Whoever said our unions and PTO was set in stone!! If people stopped believing the mind fuck that the collective public can't change laws…
Compass: it's a bit more than that.. but this is not the time for that discussion or debate… It's story time. As Chaos was saying before she got side tracked; we are in Charlotte Amelia St. Thomas and we are adventuring solo. Making our way out of the port and across the road, making sure we look right then left not left then right!!
Chaos: it helped almost witnessing a group of fellow cruisers get plowed down because they looked left first and not right…
Compass: That was scary… but we kept seeing it through the town… the locals are very understanding and most are on high alert when ships are in port. We didn't see any issues or confrontations between tourists and motorists. Now on the same side of the road for the cable car to the top of Paradise Point. Within a few minutes we were heading up to the point on a smooth cable car ride.
Chaos: You mean boring ride… no drop, dips or anything that would give a rush of adrenaline.
Compass: it was smooth as I said. At the top we took in the peaceful view since it was early and there weren't any people there. The shore excursion that does this look out point takes the road by bus… they had yet to arrive.
Chaos: That is their last stop on the tours since it is so close to the ship. I couldn't imagine fitting all those groups in those spaces. We didn't have to worry about that…. It was just after 1pm when Transport decided it was reward time.
Compass: Anyway taking in this tropical cloudy but beautiful view of Charlotte Amelia with our ship in port, and a few postcard pics to trigger memory later, it was lunch time. Grabbing a seat at the Taste at Paradise Point Heather ordered a strawberry daiquiri and a lobster roll..
Chaos: I needed some hair of the dog cure, as did transport. Especially if we were going to do everything you had planned for the day… or at least some so you wouldn't have a meltdown.
Compass: I don't meltdown, I get adamant and assertive that things will go the way I planned
CHAOS: And the more you fight the more you tend to lose. So again the universe keeps trying to teach you to go with the flow.
Compass: I go with my own flow… Having a refreshing frozen strawberry daiquiri and full from our lobster roll it was time to head back down to the main road so we could hit the next stop. We entered the cable car for the return, sharing it with only three others.
Chaos: Which happened to be 3 college boys that were a few bushwackers deep… I mean you can’t blame them…. This is the island of the original bushwacker drink…. So naturally you must sample everyone’s on the island…. Ahhh, the younger days when we could handle that type of drinking…..
Compass: EMMM…. Our liver is much happier I am sure of it….. While Chaos had Heather engaging the slightly buzzed college kids with some colorful jabs at the one that looked like he was about to hurl, I was trying to have Heather keep her distance. If he was going to throw up, I did not want any splash back. We made it to the main street, untainted and we walked towards the center of town.
Chaos: this next “stop” was just under two miles away… I get bored when there is nothing that peaks my interest to watch… so as we walked i had transport pull out her phone and do a free style recording on the fly.
Compass: it was an upside down just under 3 minute babble to our daughter about how even though the US Virgin Islands is a territory of the US it was British and so this is one of the few places in US it is legal to drive on the left side of the road
Chaos: (laughing) I didn't know it was upside down, transport sure as hell didn't and if YOU did compass you remained silent at the time cause it wasn't until much later we found out it was upside down. I had Transport post it to the site so all could see when this drops… it's just funny!!
Compass: it's amateur and embarrassing… more so now since we are learning production, visual, audio and editing…
Chaos: REAL TRAVEL…. that is all I am going to say about that. Now, the video got me some way through this uneventful cement hike. Mind you we were across the street from the Promenade that goes down to the old town…
Compass: Correct, but we were already on the correct side of the road so it would be absurd to cross to walk the same route only to cross again… we stayed on track.
Chaos: On track to 99 fucking steps!! We already just put in close to two miles now this bitch wants to fucking hippdy hoppdy up 100 stairs…
Compass: You bitched until we got to the stairs…. Then you were all smiles and giggles… don't smirk at me like that…
Chaos: R U going to tell them or do I get the pleasure?...
Compass: Go ahead, you seem much happier about this than me….
Chaos: (giggling).... Because I am…. We came to a square just before the start of the old town…. Compass has Transport pull out the phone… Da Da Dahhh time to play… {say in doppy voice] Which way do we go… which way do we go! For someone (can we call ourselves someone when we are only voices?..... Or should people start to worry that Transport is starting to truly split herself?... questions for the shrink I guess, if we ever get any takers! (laughing)....
Compass: Sidetracked….. This is not the time to discuss Heather’s possible psychology break….
Chaos: Right, we will wait till after it happens, so much more fun that way…. So for the lack of better terminology…. For SOMEONE that hates the blue dot game you sure do use it a lot Compass, I’m just saying. As Compass had transport pull up the walking route for the 99 steps and started turning the phone this way and that to find the correct direction…. I was as usual watching the perimeter which is difficult when you're fighting for control of 1 set of eyes…. But we managed, Compass finally finding the direction we walked about another 10 minutes, not seeing many tourists at all. In fact it was a locals.. the people we did see anyway…
Compass: You're right, now that I look back and think about it.. It was a very peaceful walk through a neighborhood that most tourists don’t venture into… and I don’t remember Heather feeling threatened or on any higher alert than normal….
Chaos: There was no need, really… There were no cars, only a few people out and they were all walking alone… the houses were set far enough back that there would be fair warning should anyone try to drag us in… but what helped the most, was the heat! It was hot, the locals sought shelter and tourists were nowhere to be found. Bliss…. But wait it gets better…. Now we approach the 99 steps… [giggles].... Looking up, yeap steps… stone, mossey, broken, lose and climb at your own risk type of steps…. This was the place! Great job Compass!
Compass: [sound like it is just another day] About that…. The steps were not what I was expecting…. But they were not shocking either….. Just another travel adventure for a planned excursion…. This is our M.O. and Standard operating procedure….
Chaos: By Compass I think she’s got it! It was about 2:30 in the afternoon heat of the Caribbean that we started our ascent up these wonderfully adventurous steps. *PRO VET TIP: Make sure you have plenty of water with you when walking around any Caribbean Island and keep reapplying sun screen…. Unless you want to look like a Lobster at a clam bake…. It felt like climbing into the jungle. There were palm fronds hanging over providing spotty shade, flowers in bloom alongside the dying birds of paradise…. As we climbed there was more to see… little lizards scurrying from the resting place on the cool mossy steps in the shade. Bees and butterflies zooming past our line of sight to get to the next open flower for fuel…. It was Transport and the animals only enjoying the steps today…..
Compass: It was serene, I just wish you would keep your imagination under check sometimes….
Chaos: What?! I really want to see a black panther or some sort of jungle cat… Hell I would have even settled for an orange tabby that I could at least pretend was a jungle cat…. But nothing… Se La Vie….
Compass: Dear Goddess’.... So as Chaos’ imagination was on overdrive searching for her elusive jungle cat … I tried to watch the stairs so that we would not need to crawl to the nearest street for help….
Chaos: Always the worry wort mother…. You do realize you are part of the reason Transport smokes right? To stop you from over analyzing everything that comes across her path….. Just assume everyone has a motive, it will come out at some point and in the meantime just have fun until it does….. That is when we will deal with it accordingly… Why am I being the voice of reason again!!
Compass: We are not doing this today…. Back to the story…
Chaos: Enjoying our climb up the jungle stairs on route to Blackbeard’s Castle… which has no historical accuracy to Blackbeard at all… 1. It was built by the Danish as a military watch tower during the time of colonial expansion about 1679… Blackbeard sailings was about 40-50 years later and there is no fucking way that Blackbeard, one of the most wanted pirates at the time, would have ever been seen hanging out in a military watch tower…. Great marketing ploy (this is the mind fuck bullshit we are talking about)...but the historical significance of the Dtuch colonial military site is overlooked now and has been almost reduced to the same unstable remains as its final tower.
Compass: It is sad…. The draw of marketing to the tourist mind fuck buck is more important than making sure an nation’s history is accurate. Makes you wonder what kind of history humans will have in the future?....
Chaos: The same kind we do now….. Whatever one society deems popular not accurate. Humans have not changed since the dawn of history … oral or otherwise. It’s embellished, contortured and unless absolutely humanly unthinkable, history will always be in the hands of the victors and the educated. We all know they don’t like to record the real nitty gritty of what really went on…
Heather: Ladies…. This is not a question and research the history you have been taught type of podcast…. Why is it that every episode I have to interrupt to get you both back on track…. Isn’t it a bit redundant?
Chaos: You wanted the listeners to know what it was like in your head… the real you … So here it is baby….. Hot mess and squirrel..
Heather: Why did I open this can of flying monkeys….
Chaos: because we were giving you migraines… and you're scared you're going to lose your memories in the coming years…
Heather: Thank you for the reminder Chaos….. Back on track or Compass is taking over.
Chaos: Over my dead voice? [giggles]... We reached the top of the 100 steps with no sight of my jungle kitty…. But the adventure wasn’t over yet…. As we popped out of the jungle we hit asphalt… well so much for Welcome to the jungle!
Compass: From here we head over to the Three Rebel Queens Statue commemorating the Fireburn of St. Croix in 1878. Chaos: I LOVE me a woman scorned burned story….. These women kept their word and burned it all when society would not treat them and their peers equally… Leave it to the women to bring change faster… I love my sex! The short of the long, not to take anything away from these women and their fight just to save time (and going to para summarizefrom blackpast.org Fireburn Labor Riot 1878), the history is..Contract Day (a day once a year where the black labor force of the Danish Island was allowed to air grievances and alter their contracts with their "employer" I use that as it was used back then…. a cover for another form of legal slavery – Picture it……October 1, 1878 – THIRTY whole years after the abolition law that was supposed to make black slaves fully free, 4 WOMEN led an island of Black Crucians to demand their grievances be heard, as promised. That didn’t happen. So, Mary Thomas, Agnes Salomon, Mathilda McBean and Susanna Abrahamson made good on the Black Crucians’ original threat. To burn it all to the ground….. The cane fields, plantations, mills, corrupt government buildings… all torched, nothing was spared burn.. When the smoke actually cleared, amazingly only 2 soldiers, a single plantation owner, and less than 100 Black Crucians were dead. There were over 400 arrested and nearly 900 acres of Frederiksted was smoldering ashes. All four women were extradited to Denmark, and sentenced to life in a hard labor prison instead of being made martyrs by execution or being imprisoned on the island…. See told you these were our Tribal Kin!
Compass: Reveling at the statue of only three out of the four women are shown… we read the plague and did a full 360 walk around in humble appreciation of what these women did not just for their race but for the female gender as a whole…
Chaos: Wish we lived that part with them….. That would have been one hell of rebellion and a pretty sight of watching it all burn….. Fire pretty….
Compass: Oh dear….. Chaos, focus….. So now it was on to the final destination on this part of our DIY tour…. What is now known as Blackbeard’s castle. 10 minutes later uphill we were walking around the fenced off Danish military tower that is no longer safe to climb for a view. It was at the time under restoration so check it maybe open by now…
Chaos: Can’t tell you if it is worth the view since we didn’t have a view except of a closed hotel that surrounded the tower….. Which also appeared to be under construction as well. So this was a waste of a trip to the top…..
Compass: True but you had a blast on the way down… We did run into a tourist couple that was going up to Blackbeard’s castle just as we hit the top of the 99 steps for the descent. Looking out of breath, we advised them that the best view was actually at the statue and that the tower was closed so it was not worth going all the way up. They thanked Heather for the tip and went up to the statue as Heather started the trek down….
Chaos: It didn’t take that long to get to the bottom….I had Transport skipping her way down the stairs like she was skipping through a rainforest…she refused to start yelling here kitty kitty… come on pussy… I am sure Compass had a lot to do with that…
Compass: (like Shculitz) I know nothing!
Chaos: Do I look like Colonel Klink to you??!!
Compass: Only when you act like him… Transport pulled out her phone checking the time… it was pushing 4 pm…. We were at the beginning of the old town where all the jewelry shops are….
Chaos: And best of all … Transport was still hot about boyo skipping out and we were unsupervised..
Compass: Two of the worst combinations ever….. And I found out the hard way… or the bank account did.
Chaos: [giggles] I still claim liquidable assets…… Transport knew that Effy Jewelry had a shop in St. Thomas and she tried to b-line it…. However, there were many shiny shops that begged for our attention….. And I tried to make sure we hit them all so that we could get the best deal…
Compass: For the sake of time, let’s say that Heather with the help of Chaos, every third shop Heather bought a new piece of jewelry or took a card…. Then we get to Effy….
Chaos: Hey Effy isn’t just on us….. You played a major part in this as well…. Knowing full well the value of their gems and settings …. And already knowing what we were on the hunt for this was an easy drop. Which if you remember we saved up for!
Compass: Are you going to tell the listeners what we were hunting for and the end deal or should I …
Chaos: I was pausing for dramatic effect….. Way to ruin the moment…… We need to work on your drama skills Compass.
Compass: I am good … you have enough of those skills for all of us. Continue please I can see the end….
Chaos: [disappointed] always such a rush to get back to the office dungeon…. Just enjoy the fresh air …. Da Da Dah Here comes Revenge Shopping to wreck Compass’s Day…. So here we are in the Effy store surroundended (sound like Gollem from Lord of rings) my shiny….. As distracted as I was I knew that any deviation from what Transport and Compass wanted would lead to a revolt… so instead of hindering I actually helped. Working as a functional human we found our prizes; Alexandrite and Tanazanite …. Oh the pieces we saw… we wanted them all…
Compass: It felt like we bought them all. Heather had her eye on a 3 karat Tanzanite ring set in silver…. Chaos had her eye on a 7 karat Tanzanite bracelet set in 14 karat white gold and I had my eye on a beautiful set of Alexandrite earrings ½ karat in each set in silver. As we internally argued over which we were going to buy, the salesman walked up and of course asked what would you like to see….
Chaos: {laughing] Well for starters all of it…… We walked up and down the cases pointing to all the pieces that stood out…. Trying them in the store light then taking them to the window for natural light…. By the end we had several thousands of dollars just laying on the glass case … all shouting take me home, I’ll make you happy you’ll see…
Compass: In your world Chaos we would take it all….. However, reality is we had funds for a few choice pieces and even the ones we chose were more than what I wanted to spend… even if it was an amazing deal….
Chaos: Liquidable asset Compass….. The salesman tried to upsell us the gold setting pieces with the smaller stones…… So cute thinking that a tourist in jean shorts, tank top and sandals looking like she just been through a steam room doesn’t know her gem values… tisk tisk tisk sales people…. *PRO VET TIP: When shopping for jewelry always look for the rare gems…. Anyone can have a diamond…. It’s the gems that are only found in select places and that are estimated to be mined out within 20 years or so that are the real assets, not the gold or silver setting that it comes in.
Compass: She is right.. .while gold and silver have their own value when pawned or melted down…. The gems are the ones you want to keep and pop out of the settings so that you can sell them loosely ….
Chaos: [giggles] legally or on the black market if needed.
Compass: As much as I hate to agree with Chaos, she was not wrong and did a great job haggling the salesman down.
Chaos: Yeah I did….. Transport got her ring 3 karat Tanazanite set in silver, You got your total 1 karat Alexandrite earrings, which you still have not allowed Transport to wear all these years later by the way, and I got my 7 karat Tanzanite silver bracelet… only the bracelet was too big so they took the 3 links with the stones and made a necklace for us…. I was able to get the.. pretty smile, family/friends, funny friendly tourist discount…. All in for just over 1500.00… honestly I don’t think we are going to ever beat that haggle!
Compass: You’re right ….. It hurt though, handing over the card, even with the cash in the bank….
Chaos: so frugal ….. Even when it’s a deal of a lifetime. But the revenge shopping doesn’t end there…. We hit another more local jewelry store where we bought a 7 karat Amethyst ring set in silver.. Amethyst is our daughter's birthmonth stone…. Can’t remember what we paid for that, I don’t think it was that much…. I know less than 100… but we are still not done…. We walked down a cut through from the main shopping street in the old town to the newer main street that paralleled the promenade and the ocean… as we walked to the left, Transport spotted a Turkish Lamp shop….. YES!!! There was no other thought…. In we went…..
Compass: Heather and Chaos were again in their glory….. They wanted everything….. I had to keep reminding them about shipping and luggage …. It was just exhausting.
Chaos: Stop… Transport and I made it work! We found a gorgeous lamp with blue and white pieces of glass ….. We wanted it …. At first they wanted 275…. No shipping that was not going to happen….. When we gave them 75 and they didn't have to worry about shipping the young kid went and got a woman to haggle with us…. Like that was going to get them the price they wanted…..
Compass: This was going to be interesting because in all the years of our haggling only a handful of times have we had the pleasure of haggling with a woman. Chaos uses different tactics when she is negotiating with a woman. It’s still laughing and joking but it doesn’t look as flirty to an outsider… it is more of ….. Sister to sister type of loving banter…. Very hard to explain and sometimes harder to watch.
Chaos: Over dramatic….. Using lines like; honestly woman to woman we both know this is worth this or I’ll give store this (whatever the price I chose) for the item, then I will give you this as a thank you for the assistance, a tip…. In this case, we were dealing directly with the owner of the store….. So this was going to be fun…. She came down to 225 still no shipping…. I had Transport shake her head, pull out her phone and pull up the same item on Amazon for 125 with shipping…. Then showed it to the woman as Transport advised she would rather have this one from a Turkish Store in St. Thomas than from Amazon…. So final offer would be 150 with shipping included….
Compass: The woman thought about it for a moment…. And then took the deal. She wrote up the receipt and now it was a matter of trust on the shipment….
Chaos: I trusted her….
Compass: You don’t know her… how can you trust her…
Chaos: She was a business woman…. She had a brick and mortar store…. Out of all the deals in all our travels, I was surprised this was one that you didn’t trust…. Sometimes I just don’t know about you Compass…. You say I don’t trust anyone.
Compass: Survival of fiances is my wheel house… Let's finish this please…
Chaos: Walking back to the ship along the Promande Transport was happy with our purchases. We got about half way to the ship when we saw a police car blocking a lane…. Interesting and we are going to walk right by it all…. Coming up on the scene we find a down palm tree and black sedan with a wrecked front end… Now that is interesting. Slowing down a bit so we can linger …. We see the single cop on the side walk waiting for the tow truck….
Compass: As Heather walks past, Chaos has her say out loud mind you…. Well, you don’t see that everyday…. The cop then turns around and looks Heather dead in the eye and replies… happens more often then we like to admit here and starts laughing….
Chaos: Naturally we join him…. Adding maybe for you, but in the North we don’t have palm trees, seems these would be easier to miss… only to have the cop end it with You would think! With a heart felt laugh…. Which made us break out and join him, we got what he was putin down. People be stupid! We laughed all the way to the ship, which we ended up hitting the gangplank at 6pm. Time to check on boyo and his hangover..
Compass: Only to find out that was OUR mistake…. Thinking Ryan had a hangover. When we got back to the cabin he was awake but still was not feeling good nor did he look good. This was not a hangover, this was something else…. But we weren't going to the ship's infirmary, that would be a waste of time and money… since the only things at this point he could have would be Norovirus or Covid… perhaps both…. Only time will tell.
Chaos: Well it was off to dinner by ourselves bringing back boyo a ginger ale and some food in case he could stomach it. By the time we got back from dinner with everything for him he was fast asleep. Not wanting to just watch TV in the cabin, I was going to go stir crazy if I didn’t get out… Making the decision that Transport was going to the Sugar Cane Bar to see if any of our cruise friends were there, Compass has the brilliant idea to wake up boyo and tell him we are going out. Honestly Compass, we are on a ship in the middle of the Ocean. Do you really think he would be worried if he woke up and we weren’t there.
Compass: YES…. YES I DO….. I woke him up and told him where we were going and that we would be back later….
Chaos: His reply… have fun be safe see you later love you…. As it should be..smart man. His mamma raised him right!
Heather: Hi Global Kin Heather cutting the ladies off here today… It is time for reflection. Which as you know is my favorite part of this whole process. Here is what we hope you learned on top of whatever else you yourself got out of this memory:
Never assume someone has a hangover just because they are having fun the night before; there could be something more going on that you are not aware of.
In the Caribbean heat, it is imperative that you have water on you and take deep swigs on a regular basis…. Now this could be in the form of soda, frozen drink or some sort for the hair of the dog… doesn’t matter first ingredient in all of those is water..
COMPASS: THOUGH FACTUALLY TRUE… THIS IS NOT MEDICAL ADVICE AND SHOULD NOT BE TREATED OR THOUGHT OF AS SUCH….
Chaos: In other words Don’t BE STUPID….. HYDRATE LIKE A COD FISH PEOPLE…
Heather: AHHHH… Hey .. Hi…. Remember me… MY TIME, REFLECTION… No cuttzies.. Back in your corners ladies till I’m done.
Re-apply sunscreen at least every 2 hours less if you’re sweating or swimming.. Unless the Lobster clam bake is the look you're going for.
Haggling requires knowing your audience, reading body language and having a great sense of humor… Have fun with it. The worst that can happen is you can’t agree… say thank you but not this time. NEVER HAVE HARD FEELINGS… It’s business, not personal. Everyone has to pay a bill…
Cruising has a secret language. Before you decorate your cabin door with cute fruit magnets or whiteboards, know the "swinger" subculture symbols or expect some checky, profane or odd messages from unknown and unexpected guests; keep your decor inside the cabin. If you need help remembering your cabin for those stumble tumble nights…. Just find a chair or couch no one will bother you.
If you’re going to blow the budget, buy something "shiny and rare" that you can wear while you're explaining your investment cost, to your spouse
Always remember to research what side of the road people drive on in the country you’re visiting…. Don’t want the adventure to be over before you begin to explore. Since here in the US Virgin Islands the steering wheel is on the normal side but the physical driving is the opposite! American & British combo.
I hope you enjoyed our memory this week. Here are the ladies to say their farewells..
COMPASS (calm, professional tone) On that note… we hope you enjoyed this episode of CompassChaos13. Join us every Sunday at 1 p.m. Eastern, or 1300 hours for our fellow travelers in time zones unknown. Next stop: Netherlands… Amsterdam to be exact — this time, we will be adventuring with an old boyfriend at the time, and you can bet we’ll be forging even more unforgettable connections.
CHAOS (excited, playful) This is an interesting one….. Compass had not yet broken free of my chains, so I was in full control…..and let me tell you…. I did cause total mayhem the entire week — and somehow, we still make it out alive. But hey, the chaos? Always memorable.
COMPASS (mock patience)Anyone out there wanna help a lady out….
CHAOS (interrupting, smirking) Compass please just stop!! 1. THere is no lady here…. And 2. Again That pleading really isn’t working … So, Keep your shit to yourself. We will go on talking about us because we have plenty of stories going back to 1995 and we have plans on the books for the next two years to make more!! So keep silent, we only need your ears and a finger. Sure you can use the middle one if you want to, I encourage it… Then you can take that finger…
COMPASS: CHAOS!!
CHAOS: and put it right on the share as you post this and the finger to social media using the tag @compasschaos13 … Why cause you know you want to talk ABOUT us not to us…. You love us or hate us, either way your talking baby.. Mauh!
COMPASS (cutting in, mock sigh) Please Stop. The show’s over. Just get out!(sound tired) I’m Compass — bringing the planned direction.
CHAOS (proudly) And I’m Chaos — bringing the unexpected!
CHAOS (in sync) Together, we make global connections.
HEATHER (narrator / flight attendant tone) Welcome back to the present. On behalf of your dueling hosts, Compass and Chaos, thank you for adventuring with CompassChaos13.
Before you stand, please make sure your pants are dry, your eyes are clear, and your snots are wiped — we don’t do refunds for emotional turbulence.
Some of what you heard today may sound unbelievable, but rest assured — it’s all true, and no one on this adventure is innocent.
For photos, travel tips and to read our blogs wander over to www.CompassChaos13.com.
Thank you for connecting with us today. We hope YOUR layover in OUR world brought a little curiosity, a bit of laughter, and a lot of connection.
This is CompassChaos13 — signing off.